My memory in other minds

a wedding
a ceremony
in an old mansion
a huge bar
hundreds of people
shifting between why
at times
I am working
getting people drinks
taking care of food
other times
everyone is there
to celebrate
an event related to me
it is late
one more round of drinks
for everyone
guests returning
after having departed
for other events
the light is golden
nostalgic
amber memory
infused each moment
old friends
I haven't seen in years
like moths
to a flame
blood in the pit
are slowly walking
in from the darkness
we are cleaning up
last call
in the Gardens of the West
I am on the microphone
giving thanks
to all those guests
who have come from so far
who have attended the ceremony
more drinks
resignation
the night will go on
into morning hours
reopening the cabinets of drink
the mood is somber
it is a last night
no one wants
to wake up tomorrow
as long as we keep drinking tonight
we won't have to
I am sober
silent
standing
amidst the reclining groups
those milling
sitting on the floor
some slowly dancing
alone and with another
distant music
as if from across a lake
on a summer night
am I being called forth
I want to say a final farewell
on the microphone
but know it doesn't matter
the music
is ethereal
that last sad quartet
on the deck of a sinking ship
I am amongst the dead
going through the
meaningless motions
of the role I played in life
a ghost
attending
haunting
lingering
my own wake
my memory
in other minds
sustaining my presence here