I am concerned we will miss our turn

driving through a university campus
perhaps SMU in Dallas
with LB
and old friend and fiancee
I am familiar
with all of the turns
and twists
it takes to get across campus
but she is not
although I think
she should be
I am directing her
as she is driving
she keeps making the wrong turns
and we are laughing about it
finally we are on the other side
driving down a wide street
in a nice Dallas neighborhood
she is saying she wants sex
there was another part of the dream
where she told me
about masturbating to a book
filled with photographs of cowboys
of these stylized images of cowboys
used in advertising in the 1950s
jokingly now
I tell her she should've brought
her cowboy book
but that I will help her out
she stands in the seat
and stands with her legs apart
I lift up her skirt
she is shaved clean
I begin to play with her
as she drives
everyone that passes us
coming from the other direction
can see what I am doing
she is laughing
and on the verge of orgasm
I am watching her
and watching the road
as she seems
to not be paying attention
again
I am concerned
we will miss our turn

With no comprehension of why he is here

jerry and I in a hospital world
but vast huge spaces
crowds of people
something of the university
he needs help still
but it allowed a lot of autonomy
most of the people
are not paying attention to him
this worries me
every one else has a model
that they are working on
similar to those kits
I had as a kid
plane and cars and monsters
that redolent glue
we are waiting in line
to ask for a model
a group of young girls
are also there
talking and butting in front of us
jerry is already defeated
I tell them we were here first
they laugh and mock me
laugh at jerry and mock him
I can see this upsets him
fuck it
we don't need the model
the girls are still laughing at us
as I walk away
we go outside
it is lightly raining
streets with puddles
I am on a motorcycle
Jerry is running to keep up
I realize this is crazy
and tell him to get on back
then he has his own car
I tell him he need to park
and ride with me
he pulls into a space
in front of a closed bank
his car has an awkward convertible top
he is trying to pull it up
a woman in the car next to him
gets out and walks
right through the middle
of the convertible top
jerry had to wait for her to pass
I am angry at how inconsiderate she is
but say nothing
there's no use
it is all sad and useless
jerry manages to halfway pull
the contraption over his car
I realize he probably
will never drive a car again
and he stands there
in the rain
looking at me
with no comprehension
of why he is here

Unless I am willing to pay them some money

a catering gig with jennifer
we in a grocery store
heb in austin
we bought blueberries
somewhere else
and are storing them
in reach in
similar to the ones
we once used to chill glasses
at the Showdown
we know this is
against store policies
but are hoping
just to get away with it
jennifer has an old display rack
for water
she is carrying it awkwardly
taking it outside to the car
I am watching over
the blueberries
other shoppers
are opening the doors
looking over our blueberries
jennifer keeps calling a woman
kathleen
about a meeting
to deliver the blueberries
and the other supplies
she hands me the phone
i call her again
an answering machine picks up
a man's irritate voice
with a message about
if you are calling kathleen
please stop
but if you are calling for scott
leave a message
we need to reschedule
our meeting with kathleen
but cannot get ahold of her
there are two men
pulling out our blueberries
I go over and ask
what they are doing
thinking they are shoppers
they are employees
two hippies
not in any uniform
ask me if there are mine
I say they
we are just storing them here
temporarily
they tell me I cannot do that
unless I am willing
to pay them some money

Until their children hatch and feast upon my flesh

mosquitos in the closet where I sleep
dreams of cockroaches and bugs
underneath my pallet
the insects have hollowed out the floor
like an ant colony
chambes and passageways
as long as I keep my feet
from hanging over the edge
of my pallet
I am protected
but when I relax
and my foot extends too far
I can feel their antennae
and legs probing my skin
for edibility
or if they can use my body
to extend their colony
chewing tunnels
into me as I sleep
and setting up breeding chambers
inside of my bowels
penetrating into my skull
to take control of my thinking
turning me into a zombie
keeping me alive
but paralyzed until
their children hatch
and feast upon my flesh